Letters from My Readers

Dear Michelle,

Why did you write about Marlon Brando?  I, myself, did not think he was a good actor.  Here’s my reasoning:

  • He let himself get fat.  I do not like fat people.
  • Godfather showed stereotypical mobster characters.
  • Plus, I do not like Al Pacino, so why they cast him in that movie, I will never know.
  • I did not like his undershirt in Streetcar.
  • Also, he is dead and why don’t you write about someone living?  Sean Penn would be good.  Susan Sarandon.

The only good thing about Brando was that he stuck up for the Native Americans.



Your reader


P.S.  You are gorgeous and talented.  I have a photo of you on my screensaver.  I hope you become rich and famous, too.


Dear faithful Reader and huge Fan of Michelle’s column,

Why, thank you for mentioning how gorgeous and talented I am.  You are a very perceptive and smart individual. Yes, indeed.  I do hope to become more talented, more famous and more rich, as well as sexy-to-the-max. Again, since you are such a perceptive person and so incisive insightful intelligent with such good judgment, I say to you, “If you ever run for public office, I will vote for you.”

Please send me a photo of yourself and I will put it on MY screensaver.  If you do not have a good pic of yourself, please send one of your orange CAT.




P.S. Send money.


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